Affection - Reflections

 While feelings of affection keeps us happy I have been wondering why we form strong emotional bonds with some people when we come across so many people in our life. Why some people are so special to us and even after many years we have a special feeling of warmth and love when we think about them.

There are many reasons for us to develop a strong emotional bond with another person. Someone might have done something good to us,some help,support, should have expressed care and concern ,manifested kindness all this because of their nature but we might be touched by that and start liking them for being good to us.This is liking the person for what they are to us.

We start liking certain people because we share some common interest with them , we find joy in discussing about common interests with those people. 

There are few people whom we like because of their good nature or there is something in them be it their character or skill or looks  or knowledge which we admire ,feel inspired or impressed about them. This is liking a person for what they are in general.

There are still others whom we like because they like us and their affection touches our heart.

At times we might be a little quick to like someone without fully understanding them then end up feeling hurt when we feel they did not live upto our affection or at times just because we like someone we develop unknowing expectations and feel hurt when our expectations are not met.

Some people react to hurt feelings through a defensive mechanism of detachment, they are careful in not letting another person into their emotional realm beyond a certain boundary so that they don't get into hurt feelings in the course of the journey but some people forget the hurt feelings which they have faced in the past and enjoy the flow of affection.

I personally don't support total detachment because just because someone let us down or hurt us does not mean every other person we meet will be the same. We should not always close our heart to love and affection, there are many good souls in this world. Why should we deny ourselves the joy of love for the fear of hurt? 

We should be sensitive ,grateful and reciprocate to those who are affectionate towards us. With regards to those we like, lowering the expectation and enjoying the flow of affection with a little space is a wonderful thing.