Assertiveness

 This 'assertiveness' concept, self expression, self care and self love is becoming very trendy in the modern days.

Do we have the right understanding of assertiveness. Assertiveness is many times misunderstood as expressing our thoughts and ideas without consideration for others. Assertiveness is not rigidity. Assertiveness is the ability to bend without breaking. Assertiveness is moderate flexibility. 

I recollect a episode from Mahabarath serial when Gandhari was getting married. She was not in whole hearted acceptance of getting married to a blind man, she could not resist it either. She forced herself to live a blind folded life when actually her husband was expecting to see the world through her eyes. Elders and their kula guru were not in favour of her decision to blindfold herself.   Kula guru mentioned,

" If a woman is very adamant its not good for the welfare of the family." She did not guide her children in the right direction and eventually there was a disaster. 

Be it in family life or in any human relationship one has to be flexible and be considerate of others and equally considerate of oneself.This is how we can bend without breaking. This is possible only through love. Submissive people should learn to practice self love, dominating people should learn to love fellow beings.

We should express ourself in a assertive way while balancing between love  for others and self love.