Emotional memory

Among the many people we meet, why do we remember or value some people much more than others?

It's a blessing to have these categories of people: -

The gentle lovers

People who love without demanding love, giving you the required space, and not thrusting their insecurity or excessive demands are gentle lovers. These types of people are rare and makes us feel perfect just the way we are.

Gentle people are rare; loving people are also rare. The combination of the two is very precious. We are lucky if we have such people at any point of time in our life.

The encouragers 

People who don't have an inferiority complex or superiority complex are the genuine well-wishers; they are the ones who will encourage and motivate you. the other category will try to criticize and will be fault-finding and demotivating just out of their superiority complex or inadequate feelings. 

The encouragers uplift us. They make a positive impact on us. It's a blessing to have them in our life.

The helping hands 

All human beings are interdependent; the people who reach out to us, offering help and support, will forever remain on our gratitude list.

The admirers

It's good to be appreciated. But never be carried away by those who admire or respect you without solid experience about you. The appreciation from those who have spent a reasonable amount of time with us is a good sign. Otherwise, it's just a positive opinion from surface observation or interaction. 

Be careful with the following categories of people: -

The energy drainers

The jealous people, selfish people, people who constantly complain, people with a superiority complex.  These four categories of people constantly drain us. It is better to limit spending time with such people. We need to have a mental filter not to allow their negativity to affect us.

The insensitive people 

These people may be good individuals but not sensitive to the affection and care you show them; it's better to keep a safe emotional distance from them. They make you feel bad for being good; they can never receive and reciprocate the affection we show to them.

The boundary invaders

Some boundary invaders who are selfish and aggressive can be identified easily.

Some people lovingly invade our boundaries because of their immaturity, lack of understanding, or forcefully drag us into things in which we are not interested. They gradually thrust their demands on us knowingly or unknowingly, interfering with our freedom of choice and space. The well-wishers who push us into something for our good are different from those who drag us into something for their joy.

Moving beyond the emotional memory:

The above categories also help us to understand how we behave with others. Treat others the way we would like to be treated. 

People are only instruments to make us understand how to be and how not to be. Our focus should not be on the individual, but instead we should focus on the qualities; we should imbibe the good qualities and avoid the bad qualities.

To be gentle and loving, an encourager, and a helping hand shows a certain degree of evolution. But how unconditionally one can be that way irrespective of what comes from outside shows mastery.